Just Because You Can, Doesn’t Mean You Should
I find myself saying this to our sons more than I’d like to admit. In our world of DM’ing, Snapchat, IG, FB, Twitter (likes, impressions, reactions, live feeds, stories, etc.), Amazon Prime (same day shipping and delivery), the world of instant gratification is contributing to our challenge of modeling patience, self control, and restraint to our children. These character traits are crucial to their success in all areas of life.
Just because we can order something on Amazon and get it before anyone else does, or just because we can drive to the nearest Game Stop, sporting goods store or Target and get that so call “needed” game or equipment, doesn’t mean we drop it all and acquiesce just because we can.
Add in the ADHD element where self control is always a struggle and you have a well mixed cocktail of impulsivity, hyper focusing (not letting go of wanting something so badly), and needing that instant gratification to fill a supposed need that all of a sudden exists!
If our children get envious or jealous of their friends because they have something they don’t – what a great learning opportunity!
We should be teaching our children to be happy for others when they have things we don’t. We aren’t raising selfish, entitled children, are we? We want to raise selfLESS children who are confident in themselves to have the ability to be joyful for others.
In our home, we strive to raise Kingdom Kids with Kingdom character. Selfless, grateful, joyful, patient, kind, unassuming, unentitled, humble, young men. We are a work in progress, both as adults as well as parents. Some days we hit the mark and other days we fall well below it! I am grateful for grace! Ultimately, we strive to model these “fruits of the Spirit”, if I may.
Having constraint with the worldly items and allowing our children to see that we can say, “No” to something allows them the confidence to see that it doesn’t rule our lives and we have control over it.
Remember, we want our children to learn control of their world and what “reigns” in their life and that it’s OK to say “No” to things, people and events.
What do you think?